Stonehenge

King Eric stood on the hill, and took in what he could see.

‘OK. So, it’s finished, is it?’

‘Yes, your Majesty. All finished. I hope you are going to like it. It’s taken many many summers to complete.’

‘Yes, it has taken rather a long time, hasn’t it. And now, after all this time, can you please tell me what it is? Because from where I’m standing, it looks like a ring of stones around another ring of stones.’

‘That’s it exactly, your Majesty. We’ve dragged these stones from a place far away, and brought them here for your pleasure.’

‘Why?’

‘Sorry, your Majesty?’

‘It’s a simple enough question. Why have you dragged these stones all the way from who knows where, stood them on their ends and placed some more on top? What possible benefit can there be to me or any of my people?’

‘It’s a holy place, your Majesty. It is somewhere to go to worship the Sun, and maybe offer up a sacrifice. It should please him immensely.’

‘And you know this for certain, do you? That this huge ring of stones will please the Sun so much that he won’t burn us to death?’

‘Well, obviously, I can’t say for certain, but I’ve got a pretty good idea about what makes him tick, your Majesty. Most of the time after a sacrifice we get a nice, sunny day. It must work.’

‘Most of the time. But not always. I have to feel sorry for the families of those virgins we’ve sacrificed, in the hope of a bit of sunshine, and all we’ve had is more rain. It must be very upsetting for them.’

‘Which is why this should make things better. We have built a temple, where we can pay homage to the mighty Sun.’

‘Well, I hope you’re right. It will all seem like a massive waste of time if it doesn’t work.’

‘Yes, but that’s not all, your Majesty. The stones are set up so that on the day the Sun is in the sky for the longest time, it will line up with two of the standing stones. That way, we will know when it is the middle of the year.’

‘OK. Let me get this straight. You have spent a huge amount of time, and used countless men to assist in bringing these stones here, just so that once a year you know what day it is. And on other days, we can use it to sacrifice virgins, or maybe the odd sheep, in the hope that we might get a little sunshine the next day.’

‘That’s about it, your Majesty, yes. What do you think?’

‘Honestly? I’m wondering why I didn’t question the whole operation summer’s ago. What a complete and utter waste of time. Now, correct me if I’m wrong, but I seem to remember you telling me that you’re a virgin. Only I could do with some sunshine tomorrow.’